(no subject)
Aug. 13th, 2007 06:35 pmI've been a busy bee. It's funny how it happens that when you are a wee bit unsure about something you've done (let's say work for the Nature House) and are prepared to hear that you've made a mistake or that they are not completely pleased with your vision and then you go there, present the stuff and everybody is like "wow, it's awesome". It sort of makes me feel like I was cheating a bit.. I guess it is just the stress effect or something.
I must say I was really "WOW" (a BIG time!) today when I looked through my friendlist and found a video clip of![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
velvet_realm doing a bungee jump from 110 metres! I could never do that. It made me think about courage & guts. I think I have them but it's of different kind. I would not volunteer to do anything too extreme because I am scared of heights and many other things and I have no desire to try my limits in such things (well I could try some sky diving with a parachute maybe.. or if I really truly tried to test my guts I might try one of the scary rides in the amusement park..) but I want to believe that in a difficult situation I would be able to do some miracles. But only when it is a question of life & death.
Last night I again had a dream (nightmare?) about losing my teeth. I'm not sure what exactly happened but suddenly my mouth was full of pieces of teeth and I was spitting them out because I did not want to swallow them by accident. So much blood & pieces of teeth. I think I lost altogether 5-6 teeth, most of them from the left side of my mouth. It was awful and messy but after I got all of it out of my mouth I was quite okay. I tried to talk to see if my voice sounded different. I looked at myself in the mirror to see if I looked different. And I felt these empty holes where my teeth used to be. But I was surprisingly okay and did not panic. I even had a feeling that the dentist could give me new teeth so my loss would not be permanent.
The rest of the dream was very chaotic and strange. I rose up into the sky and I was a burning Christ. I was a human being but I was a Christ as well and I knew I was to be sacrificed. I knew I was to die and to rise from the death and all I did was pray for myself to have enough love to go through it all. To have enough love.
It was a rather purifying dream all in all. Scary and painful and much too real for my liking but somehow I was not weak or alone or without hope.
I must say I was really "WOW" (a BIG time!) today when I looked through my friendlist and found a video clip of
velvet_realm doing a bungee jump from 110 metres! I could never do that. It made me think about courage & guts. I think I have them but it's of different kind. I would not volunteer to do anything too extreme because I am scared of heights and many other things and I have no desire to try my limits in such things (well I could try some sky diving with a parachute maybe.. or if I really truly tried to test my guts I might try one of the scary rides in the amusement park..) but I want to believe that in a difficult situation I would be able to do some miracles. But only when it is a question of life & death.Last night I again had a dream (nightmare?) about losing my teeth. I'm not sure what exactly happened but suddenly my mouth was full of pieces of teeth and I was spitting them out because I did not want to swallow them by accident. So much blood & pieces of teeth. I think I lost altogether 5-6 teeth, most of them from the left side of my mouth. It was awful and messy but after I got all of it out of my mouth I was quite okay. I tried to talk to see if my voice sounded different. I looked at myself in the mirror to see if I looked different. And I felt these empty holes where my teeth used to be. But I was surprisingly okay and did not panic. I even had a feeling that the dentist could give me new teeth so my loss would not be permanent.
The rest of the dream was very chaotic and strange. I rose up into the sky and I was a burning Christ. I was a human being but I was a Christ as well and I knew I was to be sacrificed. I knew I was to die and to rise from the death and all I did was pray for myself to have enough love to go through it all. To have enough love.
It was a rather purifying dream all in all. Scary and painful and much too real for my liking but somehow I was not weak or alone or without hope.
