(no subject)

I don't know why it is so hard.

I've tried to make my home look home today. But i feel so exhausted inside out. I just would like to go to bed, hide under the blanket and stay there forever. I feel like crying without any real reason but feeling so bad all the time.

And yet, I know things are ok, I'm here, you're there and autumn is on its way. My life will be back in balance sooner or later.. I just don't know when.

I wonder if I'm still mentally trying to hold on to the past or why do I feel so weak when trying to start anew? I know I'll feel great when everything is done and beautiful, and home feels home again.. so why do I linger in this empty feeling of rootlessness? Why does it feel like an enormous burden to make things right even though I know I don't really want to feel this bad?

Is it that I did not give myself enough time to cry? Is it that I no longer know myself and my life? Sometimes it seems so and it scares me so much.. scares me to drift so far apart from everything I ever knew.. Building it all anew might mean that I accept the loss.. Why can't I accept it? Because I'm not sure how deep it goes, how much do I have to lose..

(no subject)

<td bgcolor="#000000">Name</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA"></td><td bgcolor="#000000">Color</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA"></td><td bgcolor="#000000">Birthday</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA"></td><td bgcolor="#000000">Destiny</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">Enslaver of all humanity </td><td bgcolor="#000000">Date when you fufill your destiny</td><td bgcolor="#DDDDAA">November 16, 2014</td>

What is Your Destiny? by Valcion
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

Beware..